I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
