Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
You took a bar mat shot.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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