I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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