Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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