evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize