you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
