"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
