I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
