We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I would ride that face into the sunset
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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