How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
