I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
