the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize