Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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