so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Randomize
