Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Randomize
