fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
