in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize
