I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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