I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
