thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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