My brain says no but my pants say off.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
