There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
