If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
