your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
