1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Fuck appropriateness.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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