i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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