I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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