Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
you didnt know i had herpes?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
