Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
