I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
