I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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