they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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