Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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