Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
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