drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
