I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Pants 0. Shit 1.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
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