I can't watch pbs sober anymore
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
