I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Randomize