what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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