Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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