ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
