Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize