im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
