you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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