i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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