Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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