just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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