oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Sorry about my life...
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize