come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
my poor anus
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Randomize