Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
