lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
