he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
