Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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